In which Lori explains her absence and plans for the future of the blog.
Hey, everyone! It’s me, Lori. I’m back again. Hopefully for a good while. I’ve missed you, and I’ve missed blogging. The longer I was away these past couple of months, the harder it was to jump back into it. I think I know why.
For most of the year, I started each month by setting some goals and trying to figure out what kinds of things I wanted to do on the blog. It was fun, and it also gave me an idea of where to focus my energy and attention. There are always so many things I want to do, I always find myself needing to reign it all in.
For some reason in September my blog started to get a lot more views and follows than I’ve experienced all year. I wasn’t sure really why, but it was exciting, and I wanted to nurture it by posting more often. I decided to get more serious about blogging and set up a schedule so that new followers knew what they could expect and I also knew what I needed to be working on each week. It was very ambitious, and it was the beginning of the end.
As much as I tried to adjust and stay happy with what I produced, I couldn’t keep up with it. Not when I wasn’t reading or writing behind the scenes. Not blogging became stressful. It was a chore in which I found no joy.
So I didn’t blog much in October and haven’t blogged much in November. I’ve thought a lot about what I wanted to do, because despite all the turmoil I’ve been feeling I still want to blog. There have been so many times where I thought I might start back up again but felt stifled because I wasn’t sure how to address my absence, particularly since I felt I’d done nothing substantial with my time offline.
Last week I decided I wanted to blog, but something needed to change. I went back and forth over the idea of starting a new blog fresh and without a specific niche. But ultimately I realized that while the overall format is probably going to change, I still want to blog about the same sort of things, mainly reading and writing.
The biggest difference will be that I will be writing for myself. I want to be able to blog when I feel like it and not feel inadequate if I’m not doing x, y, or z. I want to be able to get more personal on my blog and in turn inspire others to feel happier in their lives no matter what they are doing. I don’t want to feel like my value comes from the quality of my writing or ingenuity of my posts. My blog is not proof or validation my worth but a record of my life.
From now on when I talk about books, I will not try to be too objective or overly insightful. I don’t see any reason I should be stressing myself out over book reviews or having more original and nuanced thoughts than the next person. I’m not a book seller/critic/marketer, nor do I want to be one unless I have a salary! I don’t want to be a arbiter of taste. When I think back about the books I’ve read, I want to remember my life context (i.e. where I read, why I picked up a book) and my immediate reactions.
Similarly with my writing posts, I don’t want to look back on old posts and just see what I wrote for my blog readers’ sake. Rather I want to be able to remember how the writing was going and have the details (i.e. illness, mood, sources of inspiration) why it was going well or poorly.
I don’t know how many people will find this post very necessary for me to have written to explain. I realize I could’ve just made these changes quietly and moved on, but I feel like I had to write this post for myself. Not to justify my choices but to organize my thoughts.
Regardless, I hope this post finds the eyes that need it most. I’m not sure how deeply my absence has been felt. If you’ve wondered what’s been up with me or where I’ve been, I deeply apologize! I always find it difficult to know when I need to take a hiatus. Just know that if I ever give up on the blog, I will most definitely announce it in a farewell post. Additionally, I’m constantly on Twitter or Instagram, even if I’m not posting, if you ever want to give me a shout!
I’ve got to go to bed now. I’ve been reading Heist Society by Ally Carter and it’s been a nice read so far. Nothing mind-blowing or earth-shattering but fast-paced and intriguing.